Why are Decisions So Hard?

Lack of Experience

How much time did you spend with babies and toddlers before becoming a parent yourself? We’d venture to guess that for most of us, it wasn’t much. Even if you have nieces, nephews, or close friends with children, the short, infrequent time spent with them didn’t prepare you for the first time your own baby had a fever or popped a tooth. Our lack of experience can lead to uncertainty, worry, and low confidence in our parental instincts. This prompts us to turn to parenting books, Google, or Instagram, where the author provides strong arguments for their particular recommendation, which is exactly the opposite of the next source you read. On top of this, we are trying to figure out everything baby-related at once, usually in a postpartum fog or in the middle of a sleepless night. All these factors lead to decision making that is less confident and intentional, and more fearful and regretful.

Lack of Community Support

If you don’t have nearby family or friends in a similar stage of life, you have an added challenge of raising your children without that built-in support and sounding board.

Social Media

With thousands of parenting accounts to follow, we can easily become overwhelmed with the overload of information at our fingertips. Influencers, friends, and retailers provide constant advice, and there is an underlying pressure suggesting that there is a right way to do everything. If you don’t take the advice or if you try something different, you are sure to ruin your child. Finally, social media has contributed to labels and boxes (for example, “crunchy” vs. “silky” parenting), where parents feel that they have to fit into the same mold that their favorite influencer promotes.

COVID-19 Pandemic Influence

Many of us raised young children during the COVID-19 pandemic, which required a tremendous amount of decision-making around how to react to the virus. In the aftermath, parents are still affected by increased fear for their child’s safety, especially around medical decisions and taking risks related to illness. In addition, we had even less social support and more virtual parenting advice.

What other personal factors have affected your decision making?